Doris Ruth Martina

Wow, hard to believe you passed away 6 years ago.  I think about you all the time.   I talk about you as often as my family will allow :)  You aren't going to believe it, but John has turned into a pretty amazing man.  He is in the Army and married to a sweet young lady.  They have been married for 3 years.  They have a 1 year old daughter, Scarlett Ann.  So you know what that means, YOU'RE A GREAT GRANDMA!!! :)  I know, that makes me a grandma :)  John was so sweet and asked me if I could be "Grammy 2" I was so honored.  Amanda graduated 6th grade and is just growing and becoming an amazing young lady.  We couldn't be more proud.  I love you mom, and miss you so much...Just one more day...

Every day seems to get harder and harder.  I miss you so much, I want to pick up the phone and call you and get your motherly advice.  Still have your phone number programmed in my cell phone, can't seem to delete it, pretty dumb, huh?  The kids are growing up so fast.  John is 17 and wants to drop out of high school and get his GED at a military school.  He's headed down a really bad path right now and this might be the way.  Amanda is amazing, learning new things every day.  She is in first grade and loves her teacher Mrs. Coursey.  Amanda is our little book worm, she would rather read than anything.  She is always going through your jewelry box and putting on your jewelry.  Remember when we visited you and she put all your play jewelry and stood over the vent and when the air blew up her dress she laughed and laughed.  Remember when we took you to the museum and John kept going through the body and came out the mouth and when he landed on the floor it sounded like a toot?  You laughed and laughed and when we were outside you put Amanda on your lap in the wheelchair and "drove" her around.  We always had a great time you, Mom.  Brian is in school going for his Bachelors Degree in computers...kinda ironic, huh?  He's doing well.  Always taking care of his family.  We took the kids tubing a few weekends ago, and the water was freezing cold, so Brian decided just to get it over and done with, and jumped right into the springs, and when he popped up, I asked him where his glasses were...they fell off his face and are floating down the Itchitukni river.  My job is amazing.  I'm still at Fleming Island Family Medicine and love my job.  I'm an official Medical Assistant, and the Drs I work for are amazing.  We get to do procedures, EKG's, nebulizer treatments, give immunizations...it's amazing.  I see you every day...every time I look in the mirror I see you, every time I go to touch a patient, I see your hands...I am so lucky you are my mom, and I love you very much.  I miss the boys, and I know it would break your heart to know that we haven't spoken in quite some time.  It's my fault, Ed has reached out several times, just can't seem to respond back to him, don't really know why.   I know in my heart that you can't read or see this, I do it for me, selfish, I know.  I love you, Mom.

One year and 3 months and I'm drawn to your website, Mom.  I start reading the poem on the front page and there, all of a sudden, are the tears again.  Rushing down like flood swollen water in a sleepy creek, the feelings come back.  So I reread e-mails I sent, recall things I said.  Look carefully at my life and realize the Lord has set this up to remind me how close I began to get to Him, by His grace, while the days closed on your grace.  Missing your ear when ever I wanted to spill my words into it, I remember who you must have talked to when no one was available.  Like you used to say about Dad, "you have a father better than any earthly father could ever be.  Talk to Him."

I do Mom.  You were right.  I miss you and wish I could speak with you none-the-less.

Well, Mom, you're 64th birthday has come and gone.  I wore you beautiful American flag pin all day at work and shared your love of our troops and your love of America with most of my patients.  I cried that day, wishing I could somehow call you and tell you that you don't look a day over 40, but there are no phones where you are.  Amanda saw me crying, and asked me why I was crying, and I told her because it was Grammy's birthday and that I missed her a lot.  She said "I know.. the angels in heaven can throw her a party and since she won't need anything because she's in heaven, the angels can bring you her presents!"  She was so adamant about it, that for a second she made me smile I love you Mom, and I know in my heart that you aren't reading this, but part of me, a very small part of me, believes that maybe you are, and that you know how much you are loved and missed.

I'm graduating tonight, and nothing would make me happier than to look out into the crowd and see you.  Part of me thinks that is so selfish...you were in so much pain and agony, but I still wish you were there.  I will cross the stage, and you will be the only one on my mind.  You always told me how proud of me you were, and I will be hearing those words as I accept my Degree.

I love you Mom, more than I could ever express.  I wish I could tell you that every time I think about you, my eyes get teary and I get a lump in my throat...I wish I could have taken all the hurt away that you had to deal with in your life.  I wish I could have made your life a little easier somehow, in someway...I wish I could talk to you 1 more time and tell you that you are the best mother any child could ask for...and if I'm half the mother to my kids as you were to your kids, than my kids will be OK.  Ask one of God's Angels to wrap you and hug you for me...

Seven years ago today, lady liberty was attacked...Mom and I cried and cried when we watched those cowardly terrorists fly the hijacked planes into the World Trade Centers.  Watching first hand our homeland being attacked brought us both back to the fact that Satan is alive and thinks he's running things on this earth...

In honor of Mom, and all the families affected by the horrific events of 9-11-01, please wear something red, white or blue or fly a flag.  This is one incident Mom used to tell me that we should never forget...God bless America!!!

If you see any Police Officers or Firefighters or Military personnel, please say a quick thank you.  They may not have been there in NY, PA and Washington, but if this had happened in their town, they would have been there...let's never forget.

As most people know, our Mom had an incredible gift when it came to sewing.  Mom used to tell me (Kim) that I was her inspiration for learning how to sew.  She wanted me to wear the frilly clothes when I was a baby and she couldn't seem to find anything she liked so she learned how to sew.  Mom used her gift of sewing and all kinds of crafts to help everyone.  She made the puppets used in the puppet ministry at First Brethern Church, she made clothes for us kids when we were younger...and when Ed and I had children of our own, Mom went "hog-wild" and made all kinds of clothes for our children, including a full layette for John.

Mom had an ernest prayer she used to pray, and that was that  God would allow her to never loose her sight or the ability to use her hands.  God, as always, was faithful till the end.  Mom was able to see her children at her hospital bedside, (I personally believe she saw us even without her eyeglasses - God is faithful that way) and when asked to squeeze one of our hands acknowledging we were there, she squeezed with the power of a 25 year old. Mom acknowledged Christ answering her prayers, and praised Him because of it.  She was and is an inspiration to everyone who was blessed by God to know her.

~Romans 6:11~

This memorial website was created to remember our dearest Mom, Doris Ruth Martina who was born in Newark, New Jersey on November 11, 1944 and passed away on June 20, 2008 at the  young age of 63.

 You will live forever in our memories and hearts.

 

 

 

It's funny...John and I were talking about Grammy today, and he remembered how much Mom hated guns.  She didn't want anything to do with them...that is, until John introduced her to "Duck Hunt" a Nintendo game where you use a plastic gun to shoot ducks on the tv screen, once John taught Mom how to play she was hooked... guns didn't seem that bad to her...especially if they were plastic.